The Gigil Club

A Guide for Dads & Partners: Supporting Birth, Recovery & Beyond

February 09, 2026

Written by Lara Taylor, The Specialist Midwife

Becoming a father is life-changing. Alongside excitement, many dads feel uncertainty, anxiety or fear of not knowing what to do. The good news? you don’t need all the answers. You just need to stay present, willing, and equipped with some tools and awareness.

Below, you’ll find what you can do before, during, and after birth, how you can support mum’s recovery and feeding, how to bond with your baby, care for your own mental health, and where to turn when things feel heavy or traumatic.

Preparing for Birth

Get educated together

Take classes geared for partners (like many from Mantenatal) and explore partner-oriented birth support resources such as The Ultimate Birth Partner by Sally Ann Beresford.

Map out her wishes, but plan for flexibility

Talk through her birth plan: what’s essential, what’s preferred, and what she’s willing to adapt if needed. Your role may include gently advocating for her when she can’t speak.

Pack your calm kit

Snacks, water, lip balm, phone/charger, a playlist, comfortable shoes — small items that help you stay grounded and helpful.

Support presence in the theatre

In many cases, you can remain with her during a C-section (unless she needs a general anaesthetic). Even when you “can’t do much,” your presence makes a world of difference.

Preparing for the Postnatal Period

Plan for recovery together

Postnatal recovery looks different after a vaginal, assisted, or surgical birth and a C-section is major abdominal surgery needing gentler, longer support. Sit down together before baby arrives and talk through what recovery might look like, and how you’ll share responsibilities.

Protect your family bubble

In those first days and weeks, less is often more when it comes to visitors. Limit who comes, and make sure anyone visiting is there to genuinely help, not just cuddle the baby. This gives you both the space to bond, recover, and find your rhythm together.

Set up practical support early

Batch-cook meals, arrange help with laundry, ask family or close friends to be on standby for errands and set up a postpartum caddy with everything you need in one place. Getting these basics covered means you both have more time to rest and focus on your baby and becoming a family.

Supporting Mum’s Recovery & Feeding

Comfort & small gestures matter

After birth, Sleep, rest, hydration & nutrition are crucial for optimum recovery. Make it your role to ensure she’s well fed and hydrated. If she’s recovering from a C-section, comfort is especially crucial. Make sure pain relief is to hand!

Help with practical care

Getting in and out of bed, lifting the baby and managing a little of the housework…small acts of support make a big difference while her body heals.

Support feeding, whatever that looks like

If she’s breastfeeding, you can help hugely by bringing water and snacks, making sure she’s comfortable, winding the baby afterwards, or settling them back to sleep. This support is proven to make breastfeeding more sustainable. If you’re bottle-feeding, take turns so you both get rest. Especially over night!

Create a rest-friendly space

Keep essentials close: drinks, snacks, phone charger, nappies, Cotton wool, pillows. This makes recovery smoother and helps both of you enjoy those early days without unnecessary strain.

Guard her rest & emotional space

Be the gatekeeper for visitors, help her get naps or showers and gently encourage her to share how she’s feeling, both physically and emotionally.

Building Your Bond With Baby

Take over between feeds

Change nappies, wind the baby, or hold them after feeds so mum can rest. These little acts also strengthen your own bond.

Skin-to-skin time

Holding your baby against your bare chest regulates their heartbeat, temperature, and breathing. It’s one of the most powerful ways to connect with your baby.

Baby care builds connection

Bath time, reading a bedtime story or taking your baby for a walk, these small things help you carve out your role as a dad.

Talk, sing and narrate

Your baby already knows your voice. Talking through what you’re doing, humming or reading aloud builds trust and helps their development, while deepening your bond.

Supporting Your Own Mental Health

Give yourself permission to feel

Anxiety, doubt, guilt, fatigue…these are valid emotions in a huge life shift.

Talk openly and early

Don’t wait. Whether with a partner, friend, therapist, or fatherhood group, sharing helps reduce the burden.

Take micro-breaks

Even 10 minutes outside, a walk, or some movement helps reset your system.

Look out for signs you need more support

Around 1 in 10 dads experience postnatal depression. If low mood, irritability or worry persist, it’s a sign you deserve professional support too.

Birth Trauma in Dads & Where to Find Help

Acknowledge it matters

Witnessing or being part of a difficult birth can leave emotional scars. It’s not a weakness to feel shaken.

Process it together

Talk with your partner, reflect on what happened, ask questions. Sometimes simply naming it helps.

Access professional support

Therapists specialising in birth trauma, perinatal mental health services, and peer support groups can help.

Use partner-oriented resources

Organisations like Mantenatal offer dedicated classes for dads, and Pandas offers useful resources & support to Dads and partners.

Final Thoughts

You are more essential than you may believe. Your presence, your dedication, your willingness to show up all makes a difference. By preparing, supporting, bonding, and caring, you bring peace, calm, and confidence into this huge transition.

For your partner, for your baby, and for yourself….your journey matters.