Rio's Smile: Our Journey Following a Cleft Lip Diagnosis

Let's start from the beginning...

When I was pregnant with my first child, Vienna, everything was smooth sailing. No complications, no surprises — just the usual nerves and excitement of becoming a mum for the first time.

So heading into my 20-week scan with my second baby, I felt calm and excited. I couldn’t wait to see my baby’s little face on the screen — I’d already imagined what he or she might look like, what kind of personality they’d have, and how lovely it would be for Vienna to have a little brother or sister.

We weren’t planning to find out the gender, but at the end of the scan I couldn’t help myself — I excitedly asked the sonographer, “Do you know what the gender is?” She paused. And I immediately felt something shift. “Yes,” she said gently, “but we do have something to talk to you about.”

The reaction...

My heart dropped. I froze.

She explained that our baby had a cleft lip and potentially a cleft palate, and gum notch.

I cried my eyes out there and then. I felt like the ground had disappeared beneath me. No parent expects to hear that something might be “wrong,” and in that moment, fear and uncertainty completely took over.

I’d never known anyone with a cleft before. All I could think was: What does this mean for our baby? For us?

Confusion, worry, guilt… all of it hit me at once. I didn’t really understand what a cleft lip even was — and suddenly, everything felt different.

But what followed was a journey of learning, adapting, and slowly finding our strength — mine, and Rio’s.

Time to process...

Once I’d had time to process the news, I started to learn more. I read stories from other cleft parents, found support groups, and slowly began to understand what was ahead.

Feeding was a real challenge in those first few weeks. We tried different bottles until we found the one that worked best for Rio (shout out to Dr Browns!). It took patience (and a lot of trial and error), but eventually we got into a rhythm — well, as much of a rhythm as you can with two under two!

Looking back, I wish I could hug that 20-week pregnant version of me and say: “You’ve got this. He’s going to be beautiful and amazing.” Because he truly is.

Giving birth to my beautiful baby boy...

The moment Rio was born, I fell completely in love with him.

I had been so nervous leading up to the birth — not knowing exactly what to expect, how I’d feel, how different things might be — but the second I saw him, all of that melted away (like every other cleft mum told me it would!). He was perfect.

We found out after he was born that while he had a cleft lip and a gum notch, his palate was intact — which was a huge relief. Everything else about him was just as you’d expect with any newborn baby: super cute and squishy!

From the very beginning, he showed us just how strong and special he was.

Surgery and recovery...

Rio had his cleft lip repair surgery at just 5 months old. That day was incredibly emotional. Handing your baby over to a surgical team — even when you know they’re the best people for the job — is heartbreaking. I cried (a lot).

But Rio came through it like a little superhero.

Four hours later, we were reunited — and met our baby’s new smile for the first time. It was still him, just with a little stitch of magic.

Babies are unbelievably resilient.

The hardest part for me was feeding him afterwards. He was in pain, he wasn’t taking in enough milk, and I felt helpless. But within a week or so, he began healing, and we found our rhythm again.

Rio’s next surgery — to repair his gum notch — will be when he’s around 7 to 10 years old, after his adult teeth come in. But for now, we’re just enjoying every moment with our cheeky, happy little boy and his gorgeous smile — scar and all.

Advice I’d give to another mum in my shoes..

If you’re reading this and you’ve just been told your baby has a cleft, here’s what I want you to know:

• It’s okay to be scared. Let yourself feel it. I was terrified, and it took me three or four days after Rio’s diagnosis to even Google what a cleft lip was.
  

• You’ll learn as you go. Feeding a baby with a cleft can be tricky, and no amount of research truly prepares you. You’ll figure it out — one feed at a time.
  

• Support is out there — take it. I’ve made lifelong friends through cleft support groups, just from asking questions and sharing experiences. Reach out. Ask everything. You’re not alone.
  

• Your baby’s first smile — cleft and all — will be the most beautiful thing in the world.

One Last Thing...

On 20th July 2025, I’m doing something a little wild — a skydive! I’m raising money for CLAPA (Cleft Lip and Palate Association). This charity means so much to us. They support families just like ours, offering guidance, comfort, and connection when it’s needed most.

If you’d like to support, donate or share, you can find my donation page here:
👉 https://www.gofundme.com/f/livs-skydive-for-cleft-lip-palate-charity

Thank you so much to Gigil for giving me the space to share a little piece of our story. I’m so proud of Rio and everything we’ve been through together.

And to any mum going through this right now: I see you. You’re not alone — and you’ve got this 💛